So, you are either thinking about or ready to organise some care for your child… child care.
Where do you start? But wait, you have mixed feelings about this. Are you being a selfish mum? Shouldn’t you be taking care of your child/ren? Do you feel at your wit’s end? Do you feel that if you do not hand over your child very soon, you just don’t think you can do it anymore? Is it time for your bundle of joy to further their life time learning opportunities and socialise and go to pre-school? Whatever your thoughts, it is time. You may be ready, you may not. They may be ready… yes, they are ready!
So what are the options?
There are many, and you can always work something out to suit your family’s needs. As a part-time working mum, I have utilised a variety of child care options. Here is my story:
When my first little Miss was 10 months of age, I went back to work. She went to my parents who cared for her at their home, and provided babysitting, until she was about 18 months of age. My parents became less able to look after a toddler who now did not sit still, and was not having a big day time sleep. They were getting older, and less mobile.
The next step was family day care. Thankfully this was in the home of a friend who happened to offer family day care. The cost was affordable, and it was comforting to know my little one was with someone I knew personally, and whose family I knew. When my second little Miss came along, I stopped work and went on maternity leave, but kept first little Miss in family day care. I needed the space to bond with the new arrival, and she needed to space to grow and do fun things that I just did not have the energy to do – painting, playdoh, and the opportunity to talk, and talk, all day long. Eventually, both my girls went to family day care but not for much longer, as the carer decided to stop.
When my first little Miss was about 3 years and the younger about 10 months, I searched around for options. Long day care is what I found, but they could only offer me the 2 days I needed for the eldest and 1 day for the youngest. But in 6 weeks time, they would have the other day for the younger. Well, I couldn’t stop work for 6 weeks, so I took what they could offer and continued searching around for something else for the other 1 day for the younger. (Once you are in a centre, it is easier to pick up more days. Get in when you can, and wait around until they can offer you what you need).
When looking for something for my near 1-year-old, I found occasional care. Although you do not have a permanent place like long day care, you can book regular spots. So that’s what I did. Every Tuesday, for 6 weeks, second little Miss went to occasional care. It was a lovely little place, which she quickly became familiar with.
Around the same time, I was feeling the pressure and wondering whether ‘day care’ was as good as ‘pre-school’. Even though it was a ‘long day care with a pre-school program’, I wasn’t so sure it was cutting it. So, I found a pre-school for my 4-year-old, 1 day a week.
At this stage I had each of the girls in 2 separate places. Although sometimes I wondered if it was the best option, I kept in mind that it would grow them in their ability to be adaptable. This has proven to be the case. I would often check in with them, and the teachers to make sure they were going ok, and the feedback was always positive and reinforced I was not psychologically damaging my daughters (a fear I had).
Following nearly a whole year of both my daughters together in a long day care centre, plus the oldest in an extra day at pre-school, we moved to a new area. I then had to start from scratch again, and start looking around for some child care. I had limited friends I could ask for any tips from, and using a local children’s services directory I phoned and visited a few places.
But, I could not find a place they could go to together. Would they cope? How was it going to logistically work with drop off and pick ups? We would have a more intense adjustment period as they both didn’t have each other to provide some familiarity and security. Overall, it was probably a good thing, as they both had their space to be themselves. The older went to a Montessori based centre, while the younger, to a long day care. When the younger started she was in the younger room, and then progressed to the ‘pre-school’ room when she was 3 years old.
Now my eldest is at school. The child care search while your child/ren are at school continues – there is before school and after school care. I had to consider, in home or at centre? My daughter tried both. My daughter has preferred a home based option, which is a family run afterschool care. It is reassuring to know she is okay, and she has a great time.
The youngest is still in long day care, with a pre-school program. The community run based centre she is at has a great program, great teachers, and we can tell she has a great time and learns new skills and develops well. Both our girls are both relatively adaptable girls who respond to change fairly well. I still worry a bit and make sure I check in with them and talk to them about how they are going.
The Bottom Line
Our child/ren are our responsibililty. Our child/ren learn all the time, in every context and situation they find themselves in. Sometimes we are not able to care for our child/ren due to work or other commitments and need to utilise child care. Not everyone has able and willing grandparents or family members or friends who can share the load with us. So, for those of you who also face this situation, I do trust that I have offered some useful insights to assist you in working out child care for your bundles of joy.
I have found that with child care it really does depend on the place where your child/ren go, and the staff/carers there. It’s important to visit the place beforehand, without your child (if you can) and ask all your questions. Observe how the staff interact with the children. Watch how the kids respond. Go at different times of the day, eg. Rest time, play time, crazy time (4.30pm onwards). If you are particular about certain things, like routine or you want to bring your own sheets, find out how accommodating they are about these things, and whether they share your personal views on matters which are important to you. Once you are happy, take your child along for a visit. Talk to them about it before and after. Explain what is happening, but don’t overwhelm them with every detail. Pitch it at their level, in terms of age, personality and temperament.
Some of the child care options highlighted in this blog
Your child stays at your house, and someone comes to look after them – babysitting
Your child goes to someone’s house, and they look after them – babysitting or family day care
Your child goes to a centre and is cared for there – long day care (with a pre-school program for 3 years and over)
Occasional Care – casual centre, you don’t need a permanent place there, but you may be able to reserve a regular spot, eg. Every Tuesday; usually only between 9am-2pm.
Before/After school care – Your school aged child goes to a centre or home before and/or after school care. They usually provide afternoon tea.
Written by Anita Leighton – December 2010
Julie
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